You might enjoy a nightmare race if...

All of your running shoes end up brown. Ditto for your socks.
You buy calamine lotion (for poison ivy/oak) by the case.
You use a stick to carry your running clothes to the washing machine.
While driving the freeways, your eyes are scouting the hills for trails.
You own a salt-encrusted 2-bottle water belt.
Your heart rate no longer goes up when you jump over a rattlesnake.
You spend an excessive amount of time looking at maps of the county.
You have a hard time getting anybody to come on your favorite running routes.
You have had a large number of people run with you only once.
You have a nice collection of running-related scars.
You wish running shoe companies would make a really good trail shoe.
You have tried running trails in boots, hi-tops, soccer shoes, moccasins, etc.
You can't stand not knowing what's over the next hill.
The floor mats in your car don't look so good anymore.
You avoid level ground.
Friends seldom ask for your advice on matters requiring sound judgement.
Your dog or cat loves to roll on your dirty running clothes.
While running in the winter, your shoes resemble 2-pound platform shoes carved from mud.
In winter, your favorite running routes occasionally submerge your shoes. And your shorts.
You look forward to the rainy season.
When you get back to your car, you're grateful the windows aren't shot out.
You run in orange clothes during deer season.
While running in summer, the roof of your mouth tastes like dust. And other things.
Some of your favorite running routes require the use of your hands.
You have limped long distances to your car after ankle sprains.
It sometimes takes 2 hours of driving time to do a 2-hour run.
You wish there was more oxygen in the mountains.
You laugh at the inaccurate mileages listed on trailhead signposts.
You have said "I'm pretty sure the car's on the other side of that mountain".
You habitually return to running routes you swore you'd never do again.
You have seriously underestimated the distance of a loop on a map. Several times.
You are sometimes late getting home from running. By several hours.
You have been escorted from the uninhabited parts of military bases.
You honestly can't understand why everyone doesn't like running where you do.